July 18, 2007

• //How I Live My Life...

  You can be as generous and as kind to people as you possibly can through out your whole life. But you will find out who your true friends are when it becomes your turn to be in a ditch and needing a lift. Or when girlfriends shows up in your friends' life.

  Common sense. Corny. But not too many people seem to find any of life's common sense, or their criticisms to others, applicable when it comes to themselves. In other words, people hold double standards when it comes to self-evaluation. If you ask me, I'd go as far as pointing out that's being hypocritical.

  I've been asked by a few people around me whether or not I am as critical of myself as I am to others. Usually they find out that I am actually lenient to entities that are not myself by comparison. It's probably why I am being looked at as a virtuoso and can stick out like a sore thumb to those who have inferiority complex. Or superiority complex. Or any complex or deficiency possible, because someone like me is always threatening their spotlights.

  Then it becomes a choice right there: Do you, maintain your spotlight on stage, or marking your territory, by showing you have the substance to shine on your own, or do you start sabotaging me and trying to remove me as a target option for the spotlight? The latter is a cop out, because it's not only an easy way out, it also eliminates your opportunity to push yourself to be better than you are now. It also shows that you don't believe in yourself, that you can't win against a competition so you had to remove it by cheating.

  How do I know if I am bring fair to others, or rather, unfair to myself? The more I am asked of that, the more I realize how little people self-reflect. And when you don't self-reflect, you're not thinking, which means you're not asking yourself the very questions that you appointed onto others:

  Do you, as a "friend", only think of your friends when you're in need of help, and hardly ever talk to them when you're not in need?

  Do you, as "friend", find it completely okay to trouble your friends' career expertise during their off-work time slots?

  Do you, as a "friend", have no problem using things your friends bought, but do not cut them any slacks when they are short on change?

  Do you criticize other guys for changing their lives around their girlfriends, but did exactly the same when if came to your girlfriend(s)?

  Do you criticize guys for stealing other guys' girlfriends, then turnaround and get a girl's phone number by using one of your friend's name and her faith in the friend, without asking him about it first?

  Do you often make claims to know something when you really don't? Why?

  Do you make up lame excuses to make your bad habits sound noble?

  When your friends excel at somethings, do you bitterly put them down behind their backs, when you should be happy and be proud of them?

  Do you say "they don't think so." when it really is "I don't think so?"

  It's hard not to be fair when you constantly ask yourself questions the way I ask myself. However, in order to be fair, you have to learn to accept what is right, instead of being self-righteous and accept only what makes you feel better. It's hard to win an argument against someone like me because reasoning and logic is always on my side. When you argue without those two thoughts, you're going contradict yourself, and yeah, pretty much look like an dumb ass.

  I've met quite a few people that didn't like me not because of who I am or how I treated them, but because of how they aren't able to be the best, coolest, bravest, funniest, or whatever when I am around. It really isn't my fault if their character flaws become so apparent when standing side by side with me. It also isn't because I am better than them, but the fact that I am willing to reach out and be kind to people. You always have to earn praises by walking the walk. Way too many people just talked, but hardly delivered.

  • 5:11 pm
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